Sunday, April 5, 2009

Page 12. Right?

the Family Effing Feud.

10:48pmDave

dude, you totally have the DVDs of the Midnight Special, don't you?

10:50pmCraig

no - but i want to order the set

10:51pmDave

both Neil Sedaka and Blackfoot are featured on that show (this is in response to Craig's use of both of those acts in his bio for a phony MySpace character he has created and maintains.)

I feel like it's the same disc

maybe you saw an ad for it

ha

it got in your sub

Sedaka is a total dork trying to be hip in this white suit and red fedora

and Blackfoot is all in warpaint and paramilitary-native american type clothes

10:53pmCraig

that's smart dressing

10:54pmDave

the guitarist dances onto stage to heavy drums before strapping on his axe, er, tomahawk

and he has a full feather bustle and shit

I love it

but f*%# Sedaka

hahah

10:55pmCraig

i remember my mom went to see sedaka when i was a kid

my mom has always been 65

10:55pmDave

yuck

I think my mom story might just blow all others away

In 1980, my family somehow ended up appearing on "Family Fued".

So my Mom, Dad, aunt and uncle, and my Grandmother went on the show

and Richard Dawson was all creepy and shit, and we got free tootsie pops in the live studio audience

10:58pmCraig

wow

10:59pmDave

(incidently, we almost didn't make it, because my older brother Dan was in the record shop instead of the arcade, where he was supposed to be picked up on the way to the taping).

so, my family beats the other family by a hair and goes on to the $10,000 round

11:00pmCraig

good so far

11:01pmDave

my dad goes first, and he does pretty well. When asked, "Name a famous drummer," my dad says, "Ringo Starr". Turns out to be the number one answer in a survey of 100.

"Survey Says!" I can still hear it.

11:01pmCraig

awesome

11:02pmDave

So Joan, my Mom, comes out. She's doing okay, but she needs to do well on this drummer question.

11:02pmCraig

buddy rich

11:03pmDave

Richard, flirtatious and soft, asks my mother, "Name a famous drummer."

*beat*

"Cubby!"

11:03pmCraig

from the mickey mouse club?

11:04pmDave

Cubby, the f#%*ing drummer from the g*#%amn Mickey Mouse Club.

Richard Dawson is perplexed.

"Who?"

Hahaha!

11:04pmCraig

awesome

11:05pmDave

They split twelve-hundred dollars between three families.

But hey, that was $400 in 1980

11:05pmCraig

not quite bass boat money, but still pretty good

a house payment

11:06pmDave

(I say that like I'm some sort of expert on the financial climate of 1980 America)

yeah, house payment

a week's supply of crystal meth

11:07pmCraig

on a slow week

like easter

11:12pmDave

man, I had something profound to tell you, and then *poof* it went away

11:12pmCraig

that'll happen

it will come back around

11:13pmDave
yeah, I guess.

After we failed to win the big prize, someone shoved my brother and sister and me to the stage and we ran down and hugged our family, which was typically a celebration reserved strictly for the victorious team. I felt like such a dipshit.

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